Thursday, April 29, 2010

Exercise + Bad Night + Dance

Tomorrow I may be exercising with some friends of mine. I'm worried, as they're all stronger than me, and mostly guys. But they know what they're doing, so it should be good for me.

Also, the next dance auditions are in just over a month. So little time to prepare!

And I am having such a bad night. Binged yesterday at school, ate too much today, and I am just crying. I'm sitting here alone sobbing over old, old hurts that won't seem to heal. They're hurts that I can't understand or rationalize, and I've spent so much time crying over them.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Inspiration

On The Farm
Bridge
Tractor Beauty
Poolside
Farm Girl
Hay Bales
Parisian
Stair-Stepper
Retro Lace
Prada Lolita
By The Sea
Sailor
Glittering
Heart of Africa
Fringe

Weight Loss!

I'm down another 1/3 pound! 146, baby! And the gym's open until 10 tonight, so I'm going to head back up there later today. I was just feeling dizzy without food, so I came home to grab a slice of pizza and a bottle of water.

Stay skinny!

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Down Some More!

I went back up to the gym for about another hour, and when I weighted myself before leaving, I was down to 146.3! Another 1/3 pound gone! And I tried a new stair-stepping machine that I like a lot. I wish I had this much time to work out every day. I'd be in shape so quickly.

Gym + Finally Down!

I just got back from the gym! And when I weighed myself, I nearly cried in joy. 146.6! It's not great, but it's a start. I'm finally down! And I'm planning on going back up there later, as I forgot my racquetball equipment before.

Also, I forgot that the dance auditions were today. I wasn't auditioning at these ones (I'm going in June), but it was weird to see so many people on campus on the weekend. Especially when you add in the mess of young kids at the gym for a kids' track meet.

Azkadellia

This woman is gorgeous!



Illness + Body Hair?

I'm still feeling sick. It seems that no amount of sleep takes my tiredness away, and my throat still hurts, though not as bad as before. But today I've promised myself that I'll go to the gym. I may only be able to do some yoga and power-walking due to the dryness in my throat, but it's better than nothing.

Also, do any of you who restrict find that your body hair grows slower? Because mine is, and that's never happened before. I don't mind at all, but it was weird when I go to shave and realize that I don't have to for another couple of days.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Imagine Yourself Thinner

If you're looking for inspiration, imagine yourself in these gorgeous clothes. Now imagine yourself in them and thin. Delicate and fashionable and beautiful.






Diary - April 22

Food: 1,221 calories
Grilled Cheese (1 sandwich) - 291 calories
Peanut Granola Bar - 170 calories
Ritz Cheese Cracker Sandwiches (one bag) - 220 calories
Mac 'n' Cheese (one bowl) - 540 calories
LifeWater Strawberry Apricot (one bottle) - 0 calories!

Exercise: 1,937 calories

Total: -716 calories

Notes:
No gym today since I was sick. Only burned calories walking and pushing stuff around at work.

Food

I ate too much today. A whole box of mac 'n' cheese! But I still stayed relatively low on calories.

Inspiration for the Men

Guys so often seem to be neglected. So here's some inspiration for you before I head to work!















Inspiration

Click the photos to see the whole image! It's worth it!

(^ I have that dress!)










Snack List

I found this on the WhyEat forums and figured I'd pass it along.

Snacks worth 100 Calories
1 cup puffed rice & 1/2 cup skim milk
1 cup puffed wheat & 1/2 cup skim milk
1/2 English muffin & 1/2 tsp butter
1 slice toast & 1 tsp jelly
1 rice cake & 1 T. peanut butter
1/2 cup vanilla yogurt
1/2 cup low-fat cottage cheese
1 cup skim milk
1 large apple
1 pear
1 small banana
1 cup chicken rice soup
1 cup beef barley soup
1 oz. mozzarella cheese
1 cup minestrone soup
1 cup turkey vegetable soup
1 cup chicken noodle soup
1 cup peas & carrots
1/2 cup prune juice
4 oz. shrimp
2 oz turkey
1/2 cup sherbet
1 cup apple juice
10 walnut halves
15 almonds
4 brazil nuts
30 pistachios
1/2 cup oatmeal
1 cup fruit cocktail
1 ear corn
1 tea matzo
1 tortilla
1 small pita (1 oz.)
1 small oatmeal cookie
1 tsp. peanut butter
1 frozen fruit bar
1/2 cup fat-free frozen yogurt

75 Calorie Munchies
1 slice bread
3 cups air-popped popcorn
1 slice American cheese (3/4 oz.)
4 raw kumquats
1 Milano cookie
2 shortbread cookies
1 medium apple
1 large pineapple slice
1 hard boiled egg

50 Calorie Treats
1 Peach
1 cup watermelon cubes
1/2 cup raspberries
1/2 papaya
1/2 mango or 1 kiwi
4 oz. orange juice
1/2 cup apple sauce
1 small orange
1 slice cantaloupe
10 small cherries or 1 small apple
2 apricots
1/2 cup fruit salad
1 large tangerine
1 sesame breadstick
2 graham crackers
3 Ritz crackers
10 oyster crackers
2 triscuits
2 saltines
1 Pecan Sandie
1 Oreo
1 Lady Finger
1 cup bean sprouts
5 animal crackers
2 arrowroot cookies
1 fig bar
3 ginger snaps

25 Calorie Tidbits
5 stalks celery
5 zucchini sticks
1 cup raw green beans
1 large carrot
1 tomato
1 small plum
1 prune
1 apricot
1 stalk broccoli
1/2 cup beets
9 brussel sprouts
1 cup shredded cabbage
1/2 cup spinach (cooked)
1 large green pepper
12 radishes
2 whole cucumbers
1 cup cauliflower
7 oz. lettuce
2 large dill pickles
2 large olives
1 saltine
1 marshmallow

Illness

Also, I'm sick. I've been feeling exhausted all week, and this morning I woke up with a terrible sore throat. Which means a part of me wants to eat heavy comfort food and another part of me wants to do nothing but sip cool water and hot chai. The real downside is that I have to miss my dance class today and can't go work out since my throat hurts too bad.

Weight

I don't understand this at all. Even with the restricting and more exercising than I've ever done before in my life, I still gained half a pound! Ugh!

Monday, April 19, 2010

School Week

Well, it's back to school today. I'm going to try to keep myself "full" on 0 calorie lifewater and just have something small and low-cal for lunch.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Gym + lifewater

Just got back from the gym. :) I played some racquetball (I'm getting better!) then went running on the treadmill, did some yoga, and tried out a stair-stepper. It's not one where your feet are moving in circles, but where you just step up and down as fast as you can. It really works your calves, and I think I'll have to do it more often.

Also, have you tried these new 0 calorie lifewaters by SoBe? They're amazing! No calories, lots of vitamins, and they taste wonderful. Strawberry Dragonfruit and Strawberry Apricot as my favorites, with Fuji Apple Pear as a close third. And they're sweet, so they satisfy my sweet tooth.What do you guys drink that has no calories? (Besides diet soda, as I don't like the carbonation and I'm not a huge fan of soda.)

Resolutions, again.

Nevermind. I can't get to the dance performance today, since it's at a different location than I thought. But that means that I have more time to spend at the gym. (Hopefully I can burn off the calories from the spoonful of frosting I just ate in a moment of weakness.)

Today's Resolutions.

I will go to the gym today. And I will go see my dance teacher's company perform today.

Awesome Thinspo Blog

I came across a very cool thinspo blog today. http://thinspiration4life2.blogspot.com/ It's all real-life girls, not just airbrushed photos from magazines of models pouting. But real, live girls. Out for walks with friends, watching basketball games, dancing, playing at the beach, etc. It's really inspirational for me.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Workout Trainer?

A couple days ago a friend of mine (who is in shape) offered to train me at the university gym. Once school calms down for me, I might take him up on it. He's fit and knows how to help other people get that way.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Michigan + Red Bracelet

I am currently in Michigan with Boyfriend and two girls for a writing convention. Luckily, it means not much eating (though still too much) and a LOT of walking. And I've been seeing the most beautiful girls here, with their black skinny jeans and long hair and just gorgeous! I am so jealous. I can't help but think that Boyfriend compares me to them all the time. And I'm sure I come up as disgusting in his mind.

Also, I've been thinking about making myself a red bracelet. Just a thin red ribbon knotted around my wrist. I believe that it would help me to cut out food and exercise more, reminding me all the time of why I'm doing what I'm doing. Do you wear a bracelet? Does it help? How do you view it or use it? Do people ever harass you about it?

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Dushku

I'm watching Dollhouse. I love Eliza Dushku. She's thin, gorgeous, and has the best badass attitude. Her shoulders are to die for.



Saturday, April 10, 2010

More Inspiration





Dance Class

My dance class on Thursday was amazing. We had a combined class, meaning that another modern dance class was with mine for the day. Which means we had about 45 students in one studio. Including a guy from my salsa class and a guy who's transferring to Juilliard. It was so much fun. We were too crowded to do anything extreme, but we did a lot of stretching and warmups. To the point where my legs ached and burned in class, but they felt fine yesterday! I'm feeling so good.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Jealousy

Today, a friend of mine and I were talking during a photo shoot, and she revealed to me that she used to be anorexic. Apparently at the height of it, she was running three miles a day and living on two coffees a day. As much as I hate coffee, I'm jealous.

Sunday, April 4, 2010